Sassers, where have you been, you may be asking. We missed you.
Well, my friends, the answer is simple really: I have been going crazy.
I feel so completely out of sorts it is not even funny. I'm not even really sure how to put it into words exactly, but the gist of it is that I think things around me need to change because my body is changing and shouldn't everything be different all at once for the maximum amount of chaos?
I broke up with Andrea on Saturday. According to her, there was no warning and no reason for it, which is kind of true for her. To me, I had been thinking about stuff and having stuff swirl in my brain until one day I woke up and said I do not love her anymore.
The break up is not really so smooth. I have no words to explain it.
We are "taking space" and doing our own things. At first when I tried to break up with her, she just kept saying no, like I was asking her if she wanted some gum. I tried to explain that you can't say NO when someone tells you she isn't in love and doesn't want to be with you and she kept just not thinking this whole thing was real or that I wasn't serious.
It is a very weird situation. I'm not even sure myself what is going on. I just know that we aren't together right now, and that is what I want right now. When we talk, things get all murky and we end up crying and being even more confused/confusing.
As you can see from this entry, I am going crazy. In fact, I think I am already there.