The thought of going back out onto the dating scene makes me want to throw up. I feel kind of like a shell of my former self.
To say that Andrea and I are not getting along so well would be noted as the understatement of the year. It is nearly impossible to live in the same house as someone that you used to be with and try to pretend that it is ok that you are both there and not together.
She has told me many times that the easiest way for her to get over someone is to date other people right away. So, that's what she plans to do. And I wish that was more ok with me then it sounds. I wish I could be like yeah I'm going to go out and date other people, but that seems like it would be so hard. I really need to focus on me and my stuff, but she's right. It is so much easier to be like see ya when you have someone else to think about.
I'm all kinds of confused. My home life is a mess. I don't really have all that many friends that live near by like I used to. I think that is part of getting older though. You just kind of get into a routine and that doesn't leave much for new things.
Le sigh.
I am just feeling sad today about the state of my life. My non-relationship relationship is so hard. I've asked for a time line of when she is leaving and she can give me nothing. She says my asking her makes her mad. Well, my not knowing makes me mad.
I'm just...tired.