I haven't allowed photos of myself to be taken in a long time.
This is the heaviest I think I have ever been. I am not a big fan of the camera right now.
This weekend was my cousin's medical school graduation and that involved a lot of cameras. I saw some photos of myself and I was like oh that is not me. And it is me. It just doesn't match what I think of as me.
I know this has a lot to do with fast food and eating out. Maybe just making the small changes?
I am not into being a skinny mini. I just wish my body didn't feel so foreign to me. I wish I was 200 lbs again, because that is the me I see in my head.
I know I am pretty and that I always wear nice things and that people love me and my girlfriend thinks I am sex on wheels but I am getting tired of all of this extra stuff.
I am not sure what this means yet. It may mean going to the grocery store everyday and buying just enough to make dinner. It may mean really kicking my own exercise ass. I just know it means a small goal, like no fast food for a week. That is a good small goal.
Ok so no fast food for a week.
There.
I made a goal, something I usually try to avoid. I know there will be some eating out, but I will not eat at a place with a drive thru.
On another note, being back at work after a few days off is not my favorite time.